It's been 8 years since you left. I still miss you a lots, I do miss you.
Sometimes, when I feel like I'm giving up and I just can't go on with all these things which burdened me, I remember you.
Yes, you. When we went to traditional market in Lumajang, you took me with your old bicycle and I was so happy at that time, screaming whenever and whereever I was and didn't care what the people said. I miss when we were fight when you wanted to watch football player on the tv while I wanted to watch my favorite cartoon programs.
Grandpa, I do miss my childhood, especially with you. No one, except mom and dad that treat me so special like you. I just tired with these people, I'm done grandpa.
This life is too cruel to your little grand-daughter.
Too many fake people here, too much lying, too much hesitation, too much drama.
Grandpa, if you were here, I'd like to share anything I'm feeling now like a few years ago, when I told you that dady had angry to me and I just wanted to left.
Grandpa, a lot of pressures I had got. This life is insist me like I'm a strong wall which can't be destroyed, while in fact I am just me. Sometimes, I just want to leave these all behind but I just can't. I feel like I have my resposibility to take those all alone, by my self. That is my weakness, I think that I can handle this alone, in fact I'm too weak.
Grandpa, I'd like you to stay. I know that, this is wrong saying and wishing like this but, I just need you now. I just want to... like when I had my holiday you were pick me up and took me to Lumajang to had my lovely holiday. But now, I totally can't. Grandma is not same with you. I miss you a lots more than ever.
I hope, when I'm writing this, you can feel me and you standing beside me, if God will.
Grandpa, I'm sorry for being crazy writing this letter to you. I know, heaven is a better way and place to a person like you. Just, see you in heaven, I wish.
Miss you
-Your little grand-daughter behind your old bicycle
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